Here is what management really have behind their desks to evaluate your skills and mistakes.

Monthly Overall Work Evaluation

Name: _____________________ Date: _______________ _____________________________________________________ KNOWLEDGE:__ Really knows what he's doing. __ Knows just enough to be dangerous. __ Only half a brain and is dangerous. __ His coffee cup has a higher I.Q. _____________________________________________________ ACCURACY: __ Does excellent work is not preoccupied. __ Pretty good accuracy with large numbers. __ Must take off shoes to count above ten. __ What's a number? _____________________________________________________ ATTITUDE: __ Extremely co-operative. __ Brown noser in good standing. __ Often annoys co-workers and fights. __ Doesn't care, never did, never will. _____________________________________________________ RELIABILE:__ Works so hard he gets extra days off. __ Very dependable. __ Rely on his being first one out the door. __ Absolutely totally worthless. _____________________________________________________ APPEARANCE: __ Extremely neat and clean. __ Looks great on his day off. __ Flies take him over fresh manure. __ Dirt, filthy, smelly, and ugly. _____________________________________________________ PERFORMANCE: __ Works hard if money is involved. __ Does great work--at evaluation time. __ Works well after ten cups of coffee. __ Couldn't do less if he were in a coma. _____________________________________________________ LEADERSHIP: __ Carries chainsaw and gets good results. __ Macho attitude. Commands total disgust. __ One time some listened to him whine. __ Unable to lead even the most ignorant. _____________________________________________________ I understand that I have been counseled and understand my rights under the privacy act of 1974. I further acknowledge that I am as stupid as a football bat, and I will make some attempt to correct my deficiencies. _______________________________________ Employee signature