Words to Live By

Don't be afraid your life will end; be afraid it will never begin.

Friday, July 10, 2009

Every Story Has a Moral

I received this email yesterday from my friend Bev in Rhode Island. She usually doesn't send jokes, so I knew it had to be really good. It is. True story, I was happy. My girlfriend and I had been dating for over a year, and so we decided to get married. My parents helped us in every way, my friends encouraged me, and my girlfriend? She was a dream! There was only one thing bothering me, very much indeed, and that one thing was her younger sister. My prospective sister-in-law was twenty years of age, wore tight mini skirts and low cut blouses. She would regularly bend down when near me and I got many a pleasant view of her underwear. It had to be deliberate. She never did it when she was near anyone else. One day little sister called and asked me to come over to check the wedding invitations. She was alone when I arrived. She whispered to me that soon I was to be married, and she had feelings and desires for me that she couldn't overcome and didn't really want to overcome. She told me that she wanted to make love to me just once before I got married and committed my life to her sister. I was in total shock and couldn't say a word. She said, "I'm going upstairs to my bedroom, and if you want to go ahead with it just come up and get me." I was stunned. I was frozen in shock as I watched her go up the stairs. When she reached the top she pulled down her panties and threw them down the stairs at me. I stood there for a moment, then turned and went straight to the front door. I opened the door and stepped out of the house. I walked straight towards my car. My future father-in-law was standing outside. With tears in his eyes he hugged me and said, "We are very happy that you have passed our little test. We couldn't ask for a better man for our daughter. Welcome to the family." The moral of this story is...

"Always keep your condoms in your car."

13 comments:

Mr. Motorcycle said...

NOW THAT IS WAAAAAAAAAY FUCKING FUNNY! I can't wait to pass this one on.

Thanks for the morning laugh!

Lady Ridesalot said...

ROTFLMAO!!!!!

I agree with Mr. M!!!

I was anticipating the sister hiding in the bedroom or something... but this was hilarious!!

I hope you have a nice day!! :)

Paula said...

That is one of the funniest things I have EVER read!!!

Arizona Harley Dude said...

Damn, can you imagine how disappointed that poor sap must have been. Now he'll be thinking about having some of that little sis right up to the divorce. And if he's gonna get divorced it might as well be because of her because the family offered it up.

Moral: The family that lays together doesn't stay together.

FLHX_Dave said...

mwahahahahahahahah!!!! mwahhahahahahaah!!! Oh man 'o man, thank you for that laugh today.

That was awesome!

Mastercheif said...

OH NO, I just pissed on my self laughing!!!!! That was great! I got a condom in a Big Hunk wrapper...nuff said!!!

B.B. said...

LMAO! I needed that this morning!

mq01 said...

hey, i think i know a family like that...LMAO!!!!!

Willy D said...

Just for that crap, I’d do the sister, the mom and the damn dog!

Queen B said...

RO! Love Bev :)

Baron's Life said...

Best one I heard for a long long time....LMAO thaks for sharing...too fucking funny....!

Dean "D-Day" said...

ROTFLMFAO!!!!!!!
Too funny!
Thanx for the laugh!

WooleyBugger said...

That was a good one alright.

Damn, I thought nobody would ever find out about that.