Very Funny Story

I have a funny story to tell, but first, the video that reminded me of the story. The video is not that long, and it's really funny: http://www.glumbert.com/physical. Did you watch it? Good. Now, the video itself is funny. But I was laughing so hard that I was crying! It reminded me of going to the gym with my Mom when I was about 18 or 19 years old. My Mom wanted to try some new equipment at the gym, so we walked around looking at everything. Then she spied the cross-country ski machine. I don't know what made her do it, but she jumped on without even reading the instructions or knowing anything about it. Let me stop for a moment and say that my Mom and I don't exactly have stellar hand-eye coordination. Nor can either of us walk a straight line - ever. If we walk anywhere together, we have to keep a distance of at least 2 feet between us so we don't bump into each other as we're walking. So, Mom gets on this cross-country ski machine, and immediately, she is all arms and legs akimbo! I've never seen anything like it! It was a close call, and she almost landed on the floor, but caught herself just before the moment of impact! I was laughing so hard that I couldn't help her up! She was laughing so hard, she couldn't help herself up! Needless to say, we left the gym immediately after that incident. We did return to the gym after that, but cautiously avoided the cross-country ski machine! In the ensuing years, Mom and I have often laughed about her ski-machine episode. I emailed her the link to the video this morning after I saw it on the news. Her reaction was, "It's funny, but I feel bad." Yeah, Mom. It is funny, but not as funny as the ski-machine!

Vacation Injury Follow Up

OK, I had my appt with Dr. Martin. I don't ever want to see him again, and here's why: He walks into the examination room with my MRI's in hand. Dr. Martin: I've got good news and bad news. (Seriously, that's what he said!) Me: Uh, OK. Dr. Martin: The good news is your rotator cuff is perfect. (He shows me on the MRI) Me: Then what is causing all of my pain? Dr. Martin: You have edema in your joint, and your bone. Me: Swelling in my bone? My bone is swelled? Dr. Martin: Yes. It's rare that we see this kind of injury outside of power-lifters. Me: Do I look like a power-lifter to you? Dr. Martin: Nope. It must have been one hell of a wave that knocked you over! Me: Still waiting for the good news, here! So I have an injury that is usually seen in those HUGE men (and women) that lift really heavy weights for sport. Yeah, that's not me. For those of you who don't know me, I try not to ever lift anything heavier than a Miller Lite bottle! When I told Kramer about the power-lifter comment from the doc, I thought he was going to croak! I've never seen him laugh that hard. I didn't think it was that funny, Kramer! So, the doc tells me that a shot of steroids into my shoulder joint should do the trick. Hmmm, can you first knock me out? Anyway, I wanted to make sure that my insurance would cover it, which it does. Next, I wanted to make sure that there would be no pain associated with this shot. Dr. Martin said, "No, it won't hurt." Then shook his head and said, "Well, maybe a little." At that point, I nearly started crying. You would think that I'd be ok around needles, having 3 tattoos. Yeah, not so much! Tattoos are on the surface. This needle looked like the barrel of a shotgun, and it was about the same length, too! He prepared my shoulder for the injection and then sprayed this stuff on it for about 15 seconds. He said it would 'freeze' the spot where the needle would go, so I wouldn't feel it. Well, it did freeze my skin, but somehow missed the layers under the skin. It still hurt! All of a sudden, the room is turning black, and I can't hear anything. Then I hear the doc say, "All done." The nurse had the smelling salts at the ready. She says, "I thought you were going out." I say, "Yeah, me too." Dr. Martin said I should feel better by Sunday. I asked him what happens if it doesn't work. He said if I'm still in pain in a couple of weeks, call him, and come back in. I was very clear with him that we would not revisit the large-bore needle in my shoulder again, and he assured me that he wouldn't. I was still in quite a bit of pain. More than I had been all week. So after dinner, I popped another Percocet and zoned out on the couch all night watching something on TV. (I'm sure it was something, but can't recall what.) And no, I didn't have a beer with it. I just drank ice water all night. Today, I'm still in a lot of pain, but hoping that tomorrow, it will miraculously be gone! I have a 4-year-old's birthday party to go to this afternoon, but it's at Peter Piper Pizza, so at least there'll be beer. I hope everyone has a great weekend!

Just A Few Things Quickly Today...

I'm short on time today, but want to make sure I post something!

1. The Hot Chick Blogger's Club ROCKS! I am honored to be included in this group of inspiring bloggers!
2. Today is my appt with the orthopedic surgeon to find out what the deal is with my shoulder! Wish me luck and keep me in your thoughts! I really want to get this fixed.
3. Percocet, for many, is a recreational fantasy world in a pill. For me, not so much. I take one little pill and I itch all over for about an hour. After that, I just lay on the couch and look at the TV with a blank stare. Big D makes fun of me for that. It does get rid of the pain, though! I usually don't take them, but last night I could not stand the pain! I'm thinking of asking the Doc for an alternative so I can get rid of the pain without all the itching! Maybe beer will help?!

I hope everyone is having a wonderful day!

MRI's Suck!

Let's see, dress me in a paper-thin piece of cloth, bring me into a very cold room, wrap my arm in a pillow, give me some earplugs and slide me into a tiny hole for 20 minutes on a cold hard surface...sound like fun? Not so much! Not one of the better experiences in my life. But, hopefully the doc will figure out what's wrong now and fix it! I didn't know MRI's were so noisy, either! And the guy could have warned me a little better: MRI guy: Here's some earplugs for you. Me: Huh? MRI guy: The machine gets a little noisy. Me: Uhhh, OK. How noisy? MRI guy: Oh, it's not bad with the earplugs in. Me: OK. What he didn't tell me is that the whole frickin machine vibrates and is still very loud with the earplugs! And it moved, too! I was a little freaked out. But I did my deep breathing, closed my eyes and went to my happy place. By the time it was over, I felt very relaxed - thanks to Big D for teaching me how to relax and go to my happy place! I now understand why peeps who are claustrophobic have to get the open MRI. I am not claustrophobic and it bothered me. I was picturing something like when I had my first CT-Scan at age 15 (I think), and it was a HUGE hole they slid me into, and it wasn't bad at all. I was sadly mistaken thinking it would be similar to that. Well, I'm glad it's over. Now we can move on to healing!! Soon, I hope! I'm running out of painkillers!

MRI Day

Today is MRI day for me! Woo-hoo! Yeah, I know: I'm a little off to be so excited about a damned MRI! But I'm in a lot of pain, here! At first, I was totally against surgical options. And to be truthful, it's still not my first choice. But, if it's going to relieve this pain quickly...I'll take it! I didn't think I'd ever feel that way, but I do. I can only take so much! I hope everyone is having a wonderful day!

Bike Trouble Continues...But Not For Long

Well, my post about Friday night stated that we had a bit of mechanical trouble, but made the run ok. Saturday night, not so much. We had to be push-started leaving the clubhouse. Then she ran like crap all the way to our destination near Maryland & 59th Ave. Big D decided that since he had to be push-started, he was going home to get the car and I would ride with M. I need to stop this story here and take a moment to tell you about M's bike. It's a newer bike. I think it's an Ultra Classic or a Road King. This bike was awesome. We had to pit stop on the way to the Stardust, and I said to M, "Big D is going to be mad at me." M asked me why, and I said, "Because I want a bike like this!" Let me just say this...it was like riding your most comfortable living room chair down the road. There was an actual seat under my butt, not just a strip of padded leather! It was so comfortable, I could have ridden all night long. Yes, it was that comfortable. And I won't even get started about the foot boards - instead of pegs! So, I was a little spoiled, and Big D wasn't mad, but does NOT want to by a couch cruiser! I predict we'll have one in 5 years. So Big D leaves (with another push-start) and M and I leave with a few others to go to the Stardust. We get there without incident, with the radio on (yes, I loved that, too!). After a while, I started wondering where Big D was. He should have been there by now. All of a sudden, he walks in and says, "I'm here, and I rode the bike." Apparently, the battery was bone dry when he got home. So, as a stopgap measure, he put some acid in it from another battery. He started the bike, rode around the block a few times, shut it off, started it again and headed our way. We walked outside to smoke, (because AZ law says we can't smoke in bars, restaurants or anywhere else) and he started the bike again, just to check it and it started right up. I thought, "Great! No more issues!" About an hour later, we said our goodbyes and walked outside to head home. Well, guess what? The bike wouldn't start. M & C tried to push-start but it would not go. We called Kramer and he brought a battery charger to us. So we waited for the battery to charge up. Still nothing. Then, unconvinced that Big D tried to push start it correctly (as we all expect from Kramer), Kramer decided that he would push-start Big D. Kramer pushed him all over that parking lot! Still nothing. At this point, it's almost 2:00 a.m. I'm tired and I want to go home. Kramer brought me home, and took the battery out of Big D's other bike and brought it back to him. I went to bed. I woke up with a start at 4:30 a.m. realizing I never heard Big D come in and I was startled by the time on the clock. I rolled over, and there he was; sound asleep. When we woke up later that morning, I found out that once he put the other battery in the bike, it started right up and ran great all the way home. It seems that the battery was messing with the whole bike, and that's why it ran so badly the other night. So, a new battery it is. I'm just glad it's only a battery, and not something uber-expensive!

Friday Night...

Friday night was a blast. We were invited to the Rough Riders M/C clubhouse as guests. The guys there are really great. Hung out with my girls T, D, I, B & T from Maine! We started at the clubhouse, but they are sans-air conditioner, so off we went to the VFW next door. Had a few drinks and enjoyed the karaoke performances (as much as we could!) then we got a phone call for a 9:00 p.m. road time. Let me explain road time: If you're not present at road time, you will be left behind. They do not wait for anyone. So at 8:59 we walked next door back to the clubhouse and got ready to ride. Not sure what happened, but we didn't line up until 9:30! Once we finally got lined up, we were off to the Stardust. Riding in a group of 12-14 motorcycles was a great experience for me. I haven't done that in almost 20 years! It seems that our bike does not like riding in a group, because we had some carb trouble on the way, but Big D kept her running and we got there without incident. There was a great country band playing at the Stardust. Had a few drinks, danced and had a fantastic night. The Jim Beam girls were there, and we did a Jim Beam Bean Bag Toss to try to win T-shirts. You had to get 3 in the hole to get the shirt, so Big D and I have two shiny-new Jim Beam key chains! LOL! Big D bought me a pink rose, but I think I killed it when I stuffed it in the saddlebag for the ride home. On the way home, the bike ran much better. It had cooled off a degree or two, so it was a bit more comfortable, but still hot. I can't wait until it cools down and I can actually wear my leather again!

It's Friday!

Have you ever noticed when you ask someone how they're doing, the usual answer is, "Fine, thanks." Or it could be, "Great, how are you?" I have even experienced the, "Don't ask" response. But not on a Friday! Oh, no! Ask this innocent question on a Friday and you get the same answer every time: "It's Friday!" Hmmm...I'm pretty sure I didn't ask what day it was. In fact, I'm positive. I know what day it is. That's why we're all smiling! It doesn't matter what time of day it is; if you're asking on a Friday, that is the answer you'll get. This phenomenon is unique to Fridays, too, by the way. Nobody answers the question with, "It's Wednesday!" Poor Wednesday! Wednesday never did anything to hurt anyone except happen in the middle of the week! It seems to me that the question we should ask is not, "How are you?" If you don't want the standard answer of, "It's Friday" you need to be proactive: "Happy Friday! How are you?" Now people know that you are in the know about what day of the week it is. They will not need to announce that it's Friday, and if they did, it would sound pretty silly. Me: Happy Friday! How are you? Unsuspecting Person: Um, it's Friday? Me: That's why I said Happy Friday. US: Oh. Happy Friday, then, I guess. Yes, people will probably think that I'm some kind of raving lunatic running around saying Happy Friday, but since when have I ever cared what people think?? Happy Friday, everyone!

Vacation Injury

If you read my blog on 6/20, http://annnelson.blogspot.com/2007/06/end-of-great-vacation.html, you'll notice that I mentioned Ft. Storey Beach in VA. The beach was fabulous; dolphins were swimming very close to shore, and even came inside the swimming area. There were beautiful pelicans everywhere, it was just perfect to me. And, as an added bonus, Dad was stationed there during the 50's when he was in the Army. How cool is that? What I didn't mention is how I injured myself at that beach. I was not as limber as I thought I would be and attempted to swim in a semi-strong current. Something happened to my left shoulder as I was swimming, so I had to pretty much tread water all the way back to shore. Funny? Not so much. Fast forward to today, almost a month later. I'm seeking medical help for my shoulder as I have tried heat, ice, ibuprofen, aspirin, Tylenol, Aleve, PainZone, BenGay, Theragesic and other therapies. Nothing has worked. The aspirin takes the edge off, but that's it. The stuff that you apply directly to the affected area has done nothing at all, except I think I may have a small chemical burn from that stuff! So, today I will call my doctor and admit defeat. I hope I didn't do any permanent damage. I've never felt quite like this before. It even hurts to drive my car! And forget about sleeping on my left side; impossible!! Once I see the doc, I will post an update on my condition. Have a nice day!

Comments On The Blog - A Public Service Annoucement

Just FYI...Bloggers live for comments on their blogs!! I know there are many family and friends that have read the blog titled, "The Top Five Reasons We Should Have Known...", but you didn't add your comment! I don't just blog for me, I blog for all of you! How do I know if I've hit the mark if you don't add comments?? I would appreciate it if you took another moment after reading the post, to add your comments. Then I know what you love, what you hate, how you're feeling, if you're in agreement, (or not!)! Thanks!

The Top Five Reasons We Should Have Known...

You ever get the feeling that you should know what's going on, but you don't? All the signs are there, you're just not putting them together! What's wrong with you?! Well, just recently, Big D and I had the feeling we should have known something was up, but couldn't quite pin it down. Here are the top five reasons that we should have known Samantha got married:

• Large diamond ring on Sam's finger in pic she sent us from boot camp (we got a really small pic, so you have to REALLY look at the bottom corner to see it)
• Large-sum jewelery store bill sent to our house by mistake
• Rodrigo moving to VA with her after boot camp
• Scramble to get an apartment (and get out of her brother's house) before we got to VA for the wedding
• The lovely "Rodrigo" tattoo on Sam's back (saw that at the beach)

Now if you take all of that into consideration, it should be fairly clear. Though, I would like you to please keep in mind, not only are we old and frail, but this was over the timespan of at least 6 months. Now, the piece of the puzzle that completed the picture:

• The piece of junk mail I found at Rex's house with Sam's married name on it
• And her husband labeling pics on his myspace account as "Me & Wifey" didn't hurt, either - but that was more of a confirmation, as we bumped into that yesterday

Big D has suspected this since the jewelery store bill showed up at our house. I did not suspect anything until "the great apartment hunt" began. The only thing we don't understand is why they didn't tell us! When Eric got married, he asked us to be witnesses, and we said, "You're too young," and then we said, "Of course we will, if that's what you want." You see, we did the best we could with them, and what we didn't teach them in their 18 young years, they will learn as they grow. We love them, and will do anything we can for them, and that's a promise.

I think the funniest thing about all of this is when I asked Deja, "Are they married?" after I found the piece of junk mail. Deja's response was to give me a total 'deer-in-the-headlights' look and stutter! Well said, Deja! LOL!

I hope that Samantha and Rodrigo have many happy years together. I really do. We had the pleasure of meeting Rodrigo while in VA, and we both really like him. He' s a very nice guy. I just want to offer this piece of advice to both of you: be nice to each other, and respect each other. It's not always easy, either, so don't be quick to throw in the towel!

Now that I know their anniversary date, it can be added to my blog!

Veronnica - I hope you're happy!

Dream Girls - Review

I don't have a whole lot to say about this movie. I didn't think it was all it was cracked-up to be, but it didn't suck. Eddie Murphy's character, Jimmy Early was entertaining, but you could see how that was going to end. (I won't give it away in case you haven't seen it.) Beyonce was OK. Again, not great but didn't suck. Jennifer Hudson played Effie White, and she kicked ass. What a voice!!! Danny Glover was really good, but no punch to his character, Marty Madison. Here's a fun fact: Beyonce Knowles lost twenty pounds on a diet of water and cayenne pepper both to appear younger (as her character is only a teenager when the film begins) as well as to better match the petite female styles of the film's era. Water and cayenne pepper??? What the hell was she thinking? Is that what I have to do to lose twenty pounds? I hope not, because I would rather keep the weight than kill myself with a crazy-ass diet! And I though Slimfast was bad!

More Randomness

OK, I tried watching Big Brother 8...I hated it. I don't see what everyone is getting all worked-up about! Maybe I'm just too old, or maybe the show really sucks! Let me tell you, when the A/C goes out at work, it's EXTREMELY uncomfortable!! I think they had it fixed by 1:00, but it was 106 today, and it took a long time for the building to start cooling off. Hopefully, tomorrow it will be back to normal. I never thought I'd be fantasizing about going back to freezing to death at work! I put in a bid on a great pair of shoes on ebay tonight. Hopefully, I'll win the bid. I hope I didn't just jinx it by blogging about them! No word from Sammy, yet, and now she's out to sea. That will be Friday's blog. Spent Sunday at Stacy's house, sitting by the pool, watching the kids. Thanks for the laughs, Stacy! Don't forget about Friday night, ok?? My Mom finally bought a condo! She signs papers on the 27th. It looks really nice. The condos used to be apartments known as "the ghetto" in the town where I grew up. The description on the website has a blurb about "catching the latest buzz at the community information board..." I cannot picture my mother hanging out at the info. board!!! But, anyway, I'm glad it's not the ghetto anymore. The condos look beautiful. If you want to see them, email me for the link. Well, I guess that's all the randomness I have today. I hope everyone had a great Monday. Now, I'm going to watch Dream Girls. I'll review it tomorrow.

Why Some Ex-Husbands Are Ex's

Just today my BFF Cyndi sent me a link to check out some photos of her daughter. The only problem: it was a link to check out ALL the photos of her ex's wedding to his new bride! Yes, classless. The photos are on pictage.com and Cyndi sent me the link, so after some technical difficulties, and having to sign up for an account to view them, I saw all the pics. (I hate that you have to sign up for an account just to view pics!) I finally saw the pics, and here were my observations:

1. First and foremost, Talia is beautiful. (Cyn's daughter)
2. Robin looks old and ugly. (the bride)
3. Her dress looks like a dirty dish-rag. (true)
4. Dave looks old. (the ex)
5. Dave looks like a DORK (honestly!)
6. She has absolutely no class sending you the link for all of these when she could have simply emailed you the ones with Talia in them.
7. Cheesecake at a wedding is, well, cheesy! (can you believe they had cheesecake?)

Now as I viewed the pics, I noticed that next to each one there is a button marked "Email this photo". She could have simply clicked on that button next to the ones with Talia in them and sent those to Cyndi, rather than send the whole album.

Sometimes I wonder how these stupid people have survived as long as they have. Do people just figure that they're too stupid to have any tact at all? I'm outraged by the sending of the link...who the hell wants to see all of her ex-husband's wedding photos? My advice to Cyndi: I know you have to deal with them all the time, and play nice in front of Talia, but when she's not within earshot, you DO NOT have to play nice. But, you don't want to waste a lot of energy on an old woman and her dorky husband, either! LOL!

Birthday Shout-Out To My Boy Rexxy!!

Rex is 24 today!!! Wooo-hoooo! He's also recovering from the surgery he had on his foot yesterday, so probably not so much partying tonight. Here are a few things you may not know about Rex:

• Yes, Rex is his REAL name (and me and Vicki call him Rexxy)
• When he's embarrassed, his ears get bright red, then his face and neck follow suit
• He sometimes tries to act like he doesn't care - but he does
• He's a nicer, sweeter person than he likes to let on
• He just recently got married
• He's in the U.S. Navy, along with his beautiful wife, and his little sister
• He has been stung by a scorpion, but I won't blog about where! ;o)
• He was a great kid, and now he's a wonderful young man
• He has ALWAYS kept us laughing!
• Me and Big D are SO PROUD of him!

The first thing people usually say when I tell them I have a son named 'Rex' is, "Oh, I had a dog named Rex once." Then they realize I'm not kidding; that's really his name!

We love you Rexxy! Hope you're feeling better - don't take too many pain pills, ok? Happy, happy birthday!

Rex - Notice how there were no pictures posted on this blog? There was the one of you from years ago on Sam's pink bicycle, but I can't find it!!! DAMN!!!

Much Love,

Ann & Dad

Quote of the Day on the Fourth!

I apologize for the tardiness of this blog, I was having trouble posting! On Independence Day, Big D's nephew Chris called us from Massachusetts. He said, "We were watching the news and saw how hot it was out there. The weather man said people should check on the elderly because it's so hot out, so I'm calling to see if Uncle D. is OK." Need I say more? Quote of the day, my friends. Chris is my favorite nephew!

Happy 4th of July

Happy Independence Day to all! Celebrate our great nation's independence with gusto today! It's going to reach temperatures of 117 here in the Valley of the Sun, so we'll work on staying cool. Our gusto: probably alternating bottles of beer with glasses of ice-cold water!

Hope everyone has a great day! Be safe!

Birthday Shout-Out to Jackie!! Sorry It's Late!

Here's to my girl, Jackie. She's moved on to a better working environment, but didn't leave me in the lurch when it counted! She's a true friend, and a hard worker. I miss seeing her smiling face at work every day, but I know she's really smiling because she's not here anymore! Happy belated birthday, Jackie. I hope you had a really wonderful day, and have many, many more!

Things I Like About Arizona

About 7 years ago, when we were preparing to move to Arizona from Boston, a lot of people asked me, "Why would you want to live in Arizona? Isn't it really hot there?" Well, yes, it is really hot here, but only for a few months out of the year. Here is my list of things I like about Arizona:

1. No snow in Phoenix
2. Very little rainfall
3. No helmet law for motorcyclists
4. Two words: Sheriff Joe!
5. New friends we have made here
6. Did I mention no snow??
7. The winters are SO nice!!
8. I would rather have 3 months of really hot crappy weather instead of having 6 or 7 months of really cold crappy weather (in MA)!
9. No in-laws here, either!
10. In one day I can go to the mountains, the lakes, the forest and the desert - and remain in Arizona the whole time! How cool is that?

On the downside, I do miss my family. I wish they would visit more. And I miss the beach, and at times the pain is unbearable. But, that's what vacations are for. As long as I have my pool I'm ok!